Saturday, November 17, 2007

My value system

Taking more than i can handle recently, things are looking's either success or failure, nothing difficult to measure.Just some choices to be made here & there.

I've some friends who are really into deep thoughts recently,are there plenty of people out there with negative inputs on their way of living in this world?Yes there is we're sure, but there are more to celebrate about,than that in fact.

Talking about negative thoughts,my darkest moment in life.Just miss her so much,my granny.

My support, and when she turns to ash, that's where my world came crumbling down.My saddest moment in life, not the studies.Of course, it hurts not completing my studies just because of the month itself, and by achieving great results for projects isn't just enough when the last assignment is to be submitted, her condition got worsen, i left Singapore for a while.I had to be away from my final semester upon completion, that's when everything went rock bottom, for me at that moment.She got diagnosed with stroke, so basically one that can't talk isn't a great feeling especially you'll have difficulties moving your muscles let alone moving around,will never forget how she replied to me when i asked her if you wants any coffee,that's always my first morning greetings.

A decision I'm glad I've made & a choice i will not regret for the rest of my lifetime.
That's about a month for the funeral alone, .
When i reaches she was already lying on the bed, with her makeup on.My tears came rolling down my cheek within...5 secs? It's a lesson, and a painful one.

How fragile life is...i told myself, to be given a choice in all aspect, the happiest moment in life.I've my dark moment, to keep as experiences.Why leave memories to haunt us anyway, when you've experienced it and that's just enough to learn from it.Keep the good ones and move on

I've a mate, she's diagnosed with cancer, and perhaps in her late stages.
She's the only child,not married and has no children, adopted one cute baby instead.She lives her life in a very much fulfilling way,so much better than us. with her parents and daughter far away from here,where only Internet connection can link us together,(talk about the advancement on the satellite communication(Was that Geo orbit anyway).

She doing so much better than anyone I've encountered along the path, she sees matters in life in the most simplest way with that beautiful eyes of hers, and the basic approach to it.She blames no one, not even God on the trial she was put in.

"There are no difficult matters in life, only matters made difficult" she said.

Why should we complicate things in the first place, maybe we should learn to cherish people around more. Maybe we should, well why maybe??

There is no master switch, in which we can control with a red button or a stick, it's more of a form of duplex- communication.Just pictured how water molecules going through the membrane, while the rest are filtered out in the process? Isn't that very similar??

Now,convert that to thoughts and imagine you are the membrane, there's no way to get past unless we ourselves takes the first move to open the door.

And it all started from friendsters then msn plus fb.

Unmotivated at home and sick.She was listening to a song "Don't speak",i thought she's feeling depressed.That was 15 Sep.
18th Sep if i've fb, and we added.roses and he likes you a lot but u hate commitments
Lahu tribe costume i dared you
20th got your number & we got married because i sent u fishes
21st you're les,one min i love you, another min i fight with u cuz you're a nerd
(complicated love-hate relationship, darlin)alpha female dealing with life, work, studies, some sorta self-actualization

I've lost a friend i treasured a lot recently.chum...a mate because i deleted my previous posts

Yes, I'm stubborn, but she won.Someone very similar in terms of personalities,how we perceive things.More than that in fact,thinking,thought process and all the funny moments like the freaking Merlion at Sentosa,the time clock,nicknames,wrong page on the map,chocolate,Mac-Donald meals,book+card+music therapy,auntie session,class 95,music taste,heard your voice,heard you cried..etc.
We control our thoughts, or subconsciously.
what you said out today, you had it inside you all along.Don't you agree?
It's just some form of moment you are sharing with the viewers unconsciously.
There are more important things in life to place our concentration on, than to ponder at times.
It's good, not always.Just hope those around can live their life to the fullest, filled with happiness, joy and laughter.It doesn't hurt being childlike for a while, you can even be rustic.

Stop these sophisticated coaching.We don't stay in a nutshell for long, you've to come out sooner or later just like shellfish.

Swear if you want to and roll in the mud.You don't have to be sophisticated every now & then
Be a child.We cannot have a choice what comes our way, but we've a choice to be happy or sad.
You make your choice.
Choose one darling.

"One will never know one despite years of friendship together until one opens up.It happens to all people."

(Text carries the highest percentage of misinterpretation, follow by voice then face-to-face communication).i don't care for now.No sweet talks, just being myself, being straightforward in the softest tone for your understanding and to understand u.

i miss you chum